Not being able to eat, crashing on the sofa after work, waking in the middle of the night to throw up — all these have a way of derailing even the best intentions. I see my husband’s tender loving patience, and I think, “Hey that’s really worth encouraging!”, but something inside me makes me want to bite his head off. Yet tiredness is not the cause of my beastliness; tiredness only exposes it.
Well, my husband’s patience runs thin too. At times like that, I want to shout, “Aren’t you supposed to love me sacrificially (ie. put up with my nonsense and never get angry with me)?”, knowing full well he has done just that for the nth times before.
But then I see that we are just humans. In an ideal world, I’d never say mean things even though I barely slept and he’d still hug and kiss me no matter what I say. It’s being humans like that, that makes me marvel at God’s grace in Marriage. One man and one woman becoming one flesh for the rest of their lives — till death do us part.
And while I wonder about the rest of our lives, I shall give thanks for the little things:
- Eating on a whim at the Cathay Restaurant because I suddenly had an appetite for the first time in two weeks — and we told ourselves it’s our “anniversary weekend” anyway.
- We didn’t have our romantic night out at Dan Ryan’s as planned for our wedding anniversary. We ended up eating Hock Lam beef noodles and sharing Snow Ice at a new dessert store — it was still amazing!
- Naming stray cats together – Mooncake, Cutesome, Centre Parting and Fishball.
- Feeding the mynahs with our apple cores in the morning – err yes, we throw them on the ground.
- Him eating according to what my appetite allows me to, which meant mini lotus paste pau for dinner once!
- Him telling everyone in the car “I like to hug her” when I had to sit on his lap.
- Getting his new guitar together.