Is my husband in the way of my party? Do I own the place especially when ‘these are my guests’ and undermine his authority (not to say, deny his right to our home)? Hospitality is not without its danger to the married couple! Self-centredness and pride means I often want to shine as the hostess — even if it’s at my husband’s expense.
Proverbs 31 provides a strong reproof:
An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
(Proverbs 31:10-12 ESV)
My husband needs to know that I love him more than I love my guests so that he will enjoy and even initiate hospitality too. He wouldn’t do that unless he can trust that I will honour and respect him around other people.
The excellent wife in Proverbs 31 brings fame and good reputation to her husband by her good works (v23). Any hospitality I show should be a blessing to my husband, not a burden.
Plus we’re told that she wins the wholesome praise of her family. (v28) In extending hospitality, do I seek the praise of other people more than that of my husband? Is that loving towards my husband? All areas that I need God’s grace in…